“To expect the unexpected shows a thoroughly modern intellect.” – Oscar Wilde

Although we can never say for sure what will happen during a wedding, one thing we know for sure: the wedding will not go totally according to your plans. There’s a lot to keep track of and a lot to coordinate, so what actually happens will depend upon the input of vendors, guests, the weather, and what you have planned.

You can’t control the weather, keep the kids in their seats or stop the bar from running out of Jack Daniels, you can control how you react to anything that happens on your Big Day.

The trick to getting past the inevitable “speed bumps” you’re bound to encounter is to just relax and tell yourself to have a wonderful day…no matter what happens!

Here are some suggestions for how to have a great time no matter who does what at your wedding:

Expect the Unexpected: There will almost certainly be surprises and not all of them will be the delightful kind. Decide ahead of time that nobody is going to ruin your day.

Keep your sense of humor: The difference between having a good time at your wedding and having a lousy time is simple. When something goes south, you can either laugh…or scream. It’s totally up to you. Personally, I’d choose to laugh, and you should, too.  Remember, no matter how catastrophic something feels to you at the time, in the great cosmic Scheme of Things, it’s small potatoes.

Keep it together: Some brides think that by demanding their way they’re more likely to get it. In reality, rather than moving these demands to the top of their list, a more typical response of any vendor who has to deal with Bridezilla is to drop them to the bottom. Remember, you catch more flies with honey than with vinegar!

Don’t lose perspective: If the roses are the wrong color or the tablecloths don’t match the centerpieces, it’s unlikely anyone else will notice. If you fly off the handle at every inconvenience or panic because something went slightly out-of-sync, then you can be sure pretty much everyone will notice!

Remember why you’re there: A wedding is a celebration! You and your partner have found each other and want to spend the rest of your lives together. When all is said and done, that’s what matters. Be joyful and make that joy contagious! A blissful bride never looks bad in the photos!

Be appreciative: When a vendor earns your gratitude, let them know it. Most wedding vendors really want you to have a wonderful wedding and will go out of their way to make sure that happens. Give credit to the vendors whose service was over and above, and use online reviews to warn future couples about any vendors who fell short. You can have the last word without ruining the mood of your wedding day.

A wedding does take planning and there’s no reason not to plan everything you can. Just remember that a plan is just a guideline, a road map through the day, and as with any trip, there may be unexpected detours and side roads you didn’t anticipate. In the end, the destination is the same, and that’s the bottom line. You’ll arrive in much better spirits if you can learn to sit back, be flexible, laugh at the bumps…and just generally enjoy the ride.